A Strange Summer


So the summer is upon us all (unless you happen to be reading this from
Japan, New Zealand, or Australia...Pals!)
  As I sit and write this, I am enjoying the view very similar to this picture, which I took a few weeks back.  
   To say its been an easy summer is a gross overstatement. Yes, being off work has its benefits but the reasons for being off work really do continue to suck. 
  In June there were a rash of traumatic events at my office within nine days. I handled myself well enough in the moment of each crisis but found that I could no longer sleep. More pointedly, couldn't (and still can't) stay asleep. I'm up every few hours. Awake and alert for no apparent reason, or I just doze lightly.. A state of 'hyper vigilance' as my doctor labels it which means I'm pretty tired all the time 
  It's getting worked on slowly and steadily so I'm not terribly concerned its just strange to be off work as much as I have been. 
  Spending as much time at the cabin as I can as the scenery is amazing, fresh air is great and the sun and swimming and beach walks are all positive things.  I've wanted to write and check in for some time now but have stayed away due to the zombie-like brain state. Even now, this post reads quite dull and drab. 
  I watched the shooting stars recently with an old friend and it was a truly amazing night. Some of the shooting stars were bright smears of light across the darkened skies and one wasn't kept waiting very long for a new visual treat. The company and the view were excellent. 
  Cabin weekend at West Hawk is also coming up and I really can't wait to spend quality time with someone I don't get to see nearly enough. We
Must continue our Bromance, and lakeside boating and eating and drinking and bonfires are all conducive to that. 
   I recognize now more than ever how absolutely lucky I am to have been given the gift of the friends I have. My life could have easily slid off the tracks at any point in my history but always these gentle souls have nurtured and guided and sometimes cajoled and pushed me back onto the road less traveled. It's the road I was born to, the one I am blessed and cursed to walk, Alone but never lonely, struggling through the dark nights of the soul but with a peripheral presence of my people.  My family of blood and circumstance and choice. 
  I'm not sure what tomorrow brings for me, truly... But I know that I have supporters cheering me on in my victories, crying along with my sorrows and heart breaks, and always holding out a helping hand. 
  This, to me, is God at work. 

To my people who are reading this. I love you idiots. To everyone else.. Make sure you tell your own idiots that you love them too. 

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