Dating in your 30's.....

  Dating in your Thirties... I've been thinking more and more about this activity as time goes on, and I figured, what the hell.... let's address this.

  As someone on the ass end of the dirty thirties now, I have noticed that dating has only gotten harder, at least for me. More and more it seems like the stories are all the same, the personalities are all ones you have seen and/or possibly dated somewhere in the past, and really, the crazy ratio seems to be getting higher.

  My personal rule for women is this; 25%. 25% of the time a woman can be crazy and wild and moody.... anything exceeding this rough percentage is simply too much for my patience to bear, and I need to bail. 

  Now! Not to say you cant be as crazy as you please, as often as you want, ladies.. by all means... do as you will, just scratch my name off the walls of your insane 'to do lists' of the mind. I simply don't care to get involved in that anymore. Life is just too damn short.

.... and crazy people is crazy!

 I've done the online thing a couple of times, and really.. no such luck in that forum as well... in fact I think thats where all the true crazies congregate; male and female! And ladies, don't think I dont know about the crazy dudes out there. Possessive, clingy, stalkery, and generally unbalanced 'men' who seem to have a very odd penchant for sending weenis pics to women.... because thats DEFINITELY going to get a solid hookup.

... I haven't tried this particular tact, but I figure if I take a Sharpie and colour Mr Winky up like Darth Vader, I might find some limited success with this... Either that or end up in jail.... which would probably entail another blog posting about 'Dating' of a whole different kind.

  My pooper just clinched shut.

  Anyway, So Online dating is pretty much a bust, and my married friends have mostly exhausted their single friends to hook me up with.. because thats never awkward, especially when it fails.... yeah... *Crickets chirping*

So that leaves the recently divorced ladies, because stats don't lie and a fair chunk of you 'happily married''s really aren't and will eventually be dumped back into the dating pool whether you choose to or not.  That has challenges though, namely baggage; kids, emotional damage, existing ex and bad blood, and that all encompassing conversation that happens daily, about how much of a shit/asshole/fucker this ex happens to be, and really.. by the time the daily tirade is over, really, I want to just go drown myself for being a man. 

  

  So dating is tricky and it always has but back in the Twenties I found the drama more, but the patience was there, so it seemed to balance, and lets not even trek back to the teen aged years.... my god what a mess.

  I have no more frame of reference on these uncharted waters. I look around and the 'Married''s look at me like Im fundamentally broken for being single, and sometimes pity! Hah... I love that. The single ladies either want straight friendship or they get that "Hungry Like The Wolf" predatory stare when you enter the room... my internal threat meter starts screeching GET OUT GET OUT NOOOOOOW!!!! I never do because my penis likes the attention, and of course I go down like a Gazelle in an African documentary..

.... that was in no way, shape, or form a sexual innuendo.

  So now I'm kind of stuck.  The choices of women my own age are few and far between, with lots of train wreck following the few still available, I can try online yet again and take my chances at batting a thousand in crazyland, try the younger pool and see how that goes.. .but really, there's only so many jokes about my age I feel like hearing. I don't have the time, energy, or straight up wherewithall to deal with the Twenty Somethings and their world as far as a seriously committed relationship because most of them arent terribly committed, hell most of them don't have a proper clue about who or what they want in life... I'm not ready for that, in fact as the weeks and months go by, I find myself caring less and less about 1)Social norms and expectations, B)What my friends and family think or want for me (Sorry guys) and #)I'm rather content being by myself

  It comes down to this. I like being alone. My space and the quiet are a way for me to cope with my very stressful and demanding job. Cop out? Yes. True? Yes. I'm tired... I don't have tons of energy that relationships with most women these days seem to require, and most women don't understand my need for alone/me time... its an absolute requirement otherwise I become a very unhappy and crankyassed character.  They always SAY they understand and respect the need, but when its time to get a bit of space, its a fight. Every. Friggin. Time.

  I dont care to hear the 'You'll find the right one' speeches. I find it condescending and completely fictitious. If I choose to, I can make it work with anyone.... anyone at all. There is NO right person... any and every person can be my right person... there.. magic dissolved! Welcome to real life kiddies! This happy ending fantasy land that people live in has polluted the waters of the dating pool, like an old dude pissing in the swimming pool... not cool!

  I can't fix it, I can't change the 'Princess' Mentality that women seem to have aquired, and I am slowly learning not to give a shit.

   I still try though.  It's not because I'm a secretly hopeless romantic or that my actions are belying my blog words. Nope... Its the pressure.

 The pressure from family, friends, sibling, parents, grandparents, and society in general, barraging me with the same message "Settle down and make babies"!!!!!

  

  I date so that the pressure eases off.  I look around with no real hope that I might stumble on 'the one' because there is no 'One'. 

  I don't bring these ideas into a new date though. Im about as objective as humanly possible, and Ill tolerate blind dates, set ups, and anything else thrown my way... Who knows right? 

  Truth - We don't need someone to make our lives complete.

  Truth - There is peace and joy in knowing and being comfortable with who you are, and not drowning out yourself in the noise of life.

  Truth - I'm still open to finding someone... prove me wrong...