A Glimpse, Part 3

You open your eyes. You are weary, swaying on your feet, the abrasive lighting in the hospital room making your eyes ache furiously as people hustle around you and nurses do their job.
You are handed a pair of scissors and told to give it a good cut, it may be slippery. A nurse holds the umbilical cord for you and you make the cut and your daughter Anneka is officially of this world and no matter how your body is doing, all you feel is a happiness and a sense of completeness. Life has fundamentally changed for you in the long run, although you have not been able to grasp the concept yet.
You are the first to announce the sex of the baby, say "it's a girl?" because the doctors said it would be a boy, but you don't care because she's the most magnificent thing you have ever laid eyes on and can't stop staring. Annie is taken to the baby oven to keep warm while they test her. She scores a perfect ten on the scale, in complete health and even grasping the side of the baby warmer and and hauling herself up and almost out of it, to the surprise of everyone in the room. You are proud and the chest swells out because you are looking at a strong, health, beautiful little fighter of a human being and she will be a force to be reckoned with in the world and you are happy to be a part of it.
You are learning the hard lesson of selflessness. It doesn't come quickly, and there are trials ahead, but for this child you will do whatever you must, and the lesson is a bitter one but worth it on all levels.
You realize that this day is the happiest day of your life. Nothing has or will surpass this day that you can ever imagine.

fast forward

You open your eyes and stare at the monitor in front of you trying to form the proper words and structure to write out without sounding foolish. In reflection, this past week or so has been one of the better times you have had in quite some time. Your Birthday celebrations have been the best and most fun you have had in well over ten years and you are content, even hesitantly using the word happy.
You realize that life is hard, everyone knows this. Your family life sucks right now, and maybe it always will, but thats ok, and work sucks and thats ok as well. You have people out there in the world who care a great deal for you and love you and will worry for you, and that is a nice feeling and awareness to have.
You are now officially thirty years old but instead of having stress or a crisis/meltdown, you have decided to simply change things. Try something new, bend where you normally don't or won't bend. What the hell, you think... you only live once, right?
Damn straight.

fast forward

You open your eyes......

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